The past couple of weeks have been pretty rough. The good thing is that Ian is sleeping a little better at night---although we still can't get him to sleep in his crib at night. But at least he will sleep in 3-5 hours increments if one of us sleeps next to him on one of the beds.
The downside is that he no longer sleeps much during the day, and cries every time I put him down (whether he's asleep or awake), which means I can't get anything done at all. Lots of days I don't even get a chance to get dressed or wash myself up until Clint comes home for lunch and takes over for me for a few minutes.
I don't know how much longer I can take not ever being able to get a few minutes to myself. I hate to say it, but I am starting to look forward to going back to work and having Ian in daycare. At least there he will *have* to learn to sleep in a crib by himself, and I won't have to be the bad guy who makes him do it. And I will get some "adult" time.
Otherwise, he is healthy, gaining weight, and getting cuter all the time. I just look forward to him getting just a tad more independent and less fussy!
Wednesday, July 21, 2004
Sunday, July 11, 2004
Milestones
I am typing this with one hand while I hold Ian's bottle---he's sitting in his carrier on the piano bench, which I dragged over next to the computer---so excuse any typos.
At his latest pediatrician appt, Ian was up to 7 lbs 12 1/2 oz! That's 10 oz in eight days! So, the pediatrician feels he has turned the corner, and his next appt isn't for another month. He also said the jaundice is gone and won't be back, and that he basically looks great and we should keep up the good work. So, yay!
Icould actually tell he has gotten bigger, because his newborn clothes are starting to get tight on him and some of his 0-3 month clothes actually fit. He's still so skinny around the middle that none of his pants fit, though---not even a pair of preemie ones we bought! Clint says he was a scrawny kid until he turned 18 and stopped gaining height, so maybe Ian will be like that, too. As long as the pediatrician is happy with his weight, I'm not going to worry about it.
He still isn't smiling regularly, although you can see he is trying to. The little corners of his mouth will go up when he's content and we talk to him, but he doesn't quite have the muscle control to pull it off yet. He is very alert and interested in his surroundings, though. He watches people's face, the ceiling fan in the living room, and he has a little board with black and white developmental pictures in his crib that he can look at for a long time.
Still isn't sleeping through the night, though---we're lucky if we can get four or five hours at a stretch. He just gets very hungry and fussy between the hours of midnight and 4-5 am. Although, he did have one glorious night a couple of days ago where he slept for almost eight hours straight. I thought I had died and done to heaven! :)
At his latest pediatrician appt, Ian was up to 7 lbs 12 1/2 oz! That's 10 oz in eight days! So, the pediatrician feels he has turned the corner, and his next appt isn't for another month. He also said the jaundice is gone and won't be back, and that he basically looks great and we should keep up the good work. So, yay!
Icould actually tell he has gotten bigger, because his newborn clothes are starting to get tight on him and some of his 0-3 month clothes actually fit. He's still so skinny around the middle that none of his pants fit, though---not even a pair of preemie ones we bought! Clint says he was a scrawny kid until he turned 18 and stopped gaining height, so maybe Ian will be like that, too. As long as the pediatrician is happy with his weight, I'm not going to worry about it.
He still isn't smiling regularly, although you can see he is trying to. The little corners of his mouth will go up when he's content and we talk to him, but he doesn't quite have the muscle control to pull it off yet. He is very alert and interested in his surroundings, though. He watches people's face, the ceiling fan in the living room, and he has a little board with black and white developmental pictures in his crib that he can look at for a long time.
Still isn't sleeping through the night, though---we're lucky if we can get four or five hours at a stretch. He just gets very hungry and fussy between the hours of midnight and 4-5 am. Although, he did have one glorious night a couple of days ago where he slept for almost eight hours straight. I thought I had died and done to heaven! :)
Saturday, July 03, 2004
Ian update
Warning: breastfeeding details ahead!
After spending the second week of his life on a "bili-blanket" (fortunately, the hospital had a portable one we could take home with us, so he didn't have to be hospitalized), Ian pretty much seemed to have his jaundice beat. His bilirubin levels went down to half their highest level, and only the very corners of his eyes show any yellow any more.
By the start of week three, we also seemed to be right on track with the breastfeeding. He was latching on like an old pro, and I had gotten to where I could hold him to my breast with one hand, and still walk around the house and do stuff with my other hand. We were also enjoying nighttime feeding, with him sleeping next to me, and me being able to just latch him on in the middle of the night if he cried. For three wonderful days, I breastfed him exclusively, with no formula supplementation.
Then, last Friday at his pediatrician appointment, although he had gained weight, he was still 4 1/2 ounces below his birth weight. The doctor told me it looked like I wasn't producing enough milk, and we needed to start supplementing him with formula twice a day. We took his picture for his birth announcement on Saturday, and looking at it, I realized for the first time how thin he looked. About this time, it started to hurt when he latched on. I realize now that he was so hungry he had just been attacking my breasts; but since I have some nerve damage from having a breast reduction, I didn't notice this until the damage was done, and I had this terrible radiating pain to the point where I dreaded nursing him. We called the lactation consultant, who sent out a lady from La Leche League. We tried to get him latched on right, but at this point I hurt so bad nothing worked. She said I looked blistered, and I should give him a couple of days off, so I could heal. We bought some bottle nipples that are supposed to be resemble breast nipples and avoid nipple confusion, and I kept pumping with the little mini-pump my sister-in-law loaned me, all the time wondering if I should just wean him or if I should invest in a hospital grade pump ($250+) and do whatever it took to get my milk supplies up.
The first night he couldn't nurse at night, Ian screamed, grabbed at me, and made it almost impossible for me to even hold him (especially since I hurt, and he kept grabbing me). He was so angry, because he could smell me and my milk, but he couldn't have any! Then, the next day, I got my first migraine since I got pregnant, and couldn't feed him for another three headachy days because I had migraine medicine in my system. I began to think maybe breastfeeding was doomed, but kept pumping so my milk wouldn't dry up. I cried a lot of tears about not being able to breastfeed him---he just liked it so much, and it was much easier on his system than the formula (he didn't poop the whole time he was on formula alone).
Finally, after three days the drug cleared my system, and when I still couldn't get Ian latched on without pain, I made an appointment with the hospital lactation consultant. I was thinking maybe the best I could hope for was going to be pumping breastmilk to feed him by bottle. But, she got him latched on for me, and I have been nursing him for the past couple of days without problems. She did say we needed to continue with the formula in addition to breast milk, just to keep his weight gain on track (he gained about three times as much weight with supplement as with breast milk alone), but he is doing great so far, no "nipple confusion" between breast and bottle, and just a very happy camper to be able to have his "magical boobie" again. The lactation consultant said I was doing great, and I am just very happy that he is getting as much breast milk as I can give him. And yes, he is "regular" again (amazing how obsessed you can get about another human being's bodily functions when you're a mother)!
For anyone out there struggling with breastfeeding or contemplating breastfeeding for their baby---don't be discouraged if it is harder than you expected. As I talk to other women who have had kids, I realize that breast *milk* may be natural, but breast feeding is more than a little tricky. You have to be persistent, make lots of use of the resources that are available to you, and resolve not to feel like a failure if you have to use the bottle to get your little one fed (after all, *that* is the main point!)
After spending the second week of his life on a "bili-blanket" (fortunately, the hospital had a portable one we could take home with us, so he didn't have to be hospitalized), Ian pretty much seemed to have his jaundice beat. His bilirubin levels went down to half their highest level, and only the very corners of his eyes show any yellow any more.
By the start of week three, we also seemed to be right on track with the breastfeeding. He was latching on like an old pro, and I had gotten to where I could hold him to my breast with one hand, and still walk around the house and do stuff with my other hand. We were also enjoying nighttime feeding, with him sleeping next to me, and me being able to just latch him on in the middle of the night if he cried. For three wonderful days, I breastfed him exclusively, with no formula supplementation.
Then, last Friday at his pediatrician appointment, although he had gained weight, he was still 4 1/2 ounces below his birth weight. The doctor told me it looked like I wasn't producing enough milk, and we needed to start supplementing him with formula twice a day. We took his picture for his birth announcement on Saturday, and looking at it, I realized for the first time how thin he looked. About this time, it started to hurt when he latched on. I realize now that he was so hungry he had just been attacking my breasts; but since I have some nerve damage from having a breast reduction, I didn't notice this until the damage was done, and I had this terrible radiating pain to the point where I dreaded nursing him. We called the lactation consultant, who sent out a lady from La Leche League. We tried to get him latched on right, but at this point I hurt so bad nothing worked. She said I looked blistered, and I should give him a couple of days off, so I could heal. We bought some bottle nipples that are supposed to be resemble breast nipples and avoid nipple confusion, and I kept pumping with the little mini-pump my sister-in-law loaned me, all the time wondering if I should just wean him or if I should invest in a hospital grade pump ($250+) and do whatever it took to get my milk supplies up.
The first night he couldn't nurse at night, Ian screamed, grabbed at me, and made it almost impossible for me to even hold him (especially since I hurt, and he kept grabbing me). He was so angry, because he could smell me and my milk, but he couldn't have any! Then, the next day, I got my first migraine since I got pregnant, and couldn't feed him for another three headachy days because I had migraine medicine in my system. I began to think maybe breastfeeding was doomed, but kept pumping so my milk wouldn't dry up. I cried a lot of tears about not being able to breastfeed him---he just liked it so much, and it was much easier on his system than the formula (he didn't poop the whole time he was on formula alone).
Finally, after three days the drug cleared my system, and when I still couldn't get Ian latched on without pain, I made an appointment with the hospital lactation consultant. I was thinking maybe the best I could hope for was going to be pumping breastmilk to feed him by bottle. But, she got him latched on for me, and I have been nursing him for the past couple of days without problems. She did say we needed to continue with the formula in addition to breast milk, just to keep his weight gain on track (he gained about three times as much weight with supplement as with breast milk alone), but he is doing great so far, no "nipple confusion" between breast and bottle, and just a very happy camper to be able to have his "magical boobie" again. The lactation consultant said I was doing great, and I am just very happy that he is getting as much breast milk as I can give him. And yes, he is "regular" again (amazing how obsessed you can get about another human being's bodily functions when you're a mother)!
For anyone out there struggling with breastfeeding or contemplating breastfeeding for their baby---don't be discouraged if it is harder than you expected. As I talk to other women who have had kids, I realize that breast *milk* may be natural, but breast feeding is more than a little tricky. You have to be persistent, make lots of use of the resources that are available to you, and resolve not to feel like a failure if you have to use the bottle to get your little one fed (after all, *that* is the main point!)
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